Monday, 26 January 2009

No Battle, No Victory

Sunday 25/01/09
Vernon Park 10:30am
Robin Hood v TriColor
Last weeks victory over Backup had lofted the Robin to the dizzying heights of ninth in the league. This week the Robin were attempting to do something that had alluded them so far this season. Could the Robin string together back to back wins in the league?. On paper things were not looking good TriColor were third in the league and had already beaten the Robin three one in their previous meeting. But the Robin had the wind at there backs and momentum from last weeks game, once again the banter was good and spirits were high. The only thing not there was Wayne who was M.I.A. This meant a new central defensive partnership of Shaggy and Obi-Wan, would it work out?.
Time to get on with it though the ref was looking a little worse for wear, but I was assured he was ill and not hungover, but had toughed it out to turn up today or as the Guru put it "People will do owt for money". Peep peep peep, and the hare is on the move (sorry that's the dogs), kick off. The game starts at a reasonably fast pace for a Sunday morning but with the ball spending most of its time in the middle third of the park. Both sides had good chances in the first ten minutes with Pone latching on to an exquisite ball from Gattuszola that split TriColor defense in two, however Pone only managed to knock the ball wide of the goal, but it was an encouraging sign. Tricolor also had there opportunity after a slight defensive mix up allowed a TriColor player to get past the back line and bear down on goal, with Quavers advancing off his line the TriColor player had to attempt the lob. He did so but his lob was not accurate and the ball sailed wide of the mark. Fifteenth minute and the deadlock is broken a speculative high ball over the Robin defense sees TriColor get in behind and put the ball in the back of the net GOAL!!! Robin 0 - 1 TriColor. Robin pick themselves up and dust themselves off, the goal was against the run of play and the team knows there is a long way to go in this game. Eight minutes later however Robins confidence is given another blow as the ref whistles for a penalty in an questionable decision. Obi-Wan had quite legitimately jumped for the ball with a TriColor player whilst on the by line in the area to the right hand side (from my vantage point) of the goal. The ref obviously had seen something in it and awarded the penalty, GOAL!!! penalty dispatched TriColor extend their lead. Robin 0 - 2 TriColor. What the F**k straight from Robin's restart Skip saw the TriColor keeper off his line and smashed the ball from just inside the Robin's own half which flew over the keepers head and into the onion bag! GOAL!!! Robin are back in it less than a minute after conceding the second. Robin 1 - 2 TriColor. Skip's goal did not give the Robin time to dwell on TriColor's second or the penalty decision and with that a new wave of confidence had washed over the boys. Twenty Ninth minute and a combination of Ali "Sex Pest" Brown's cracking pass and Pone springing TriColor's offside trap saw Pone one on one again this time a different result to the chance in the first ten minutes GOAL!!! Robin 2 - 2 TriColor. The next fifteen minutes saw the Robin have relative control and be the only ones looking like scoring. Peep Peep, half time.
Robin Hood 2 - 2 TriColor.
The second half gets under way with the ref looking ever so ropey and pale, but he is trooper and the game goes on. The first fifteen of this half are very similar to the last in the first half with the robin having most of the play. Sixty first minute and a long range effort from Kebab causes chaos in the TriColor defense allowing Kyle to nip in and poach one for himself GOAL!!! Robin 3 - 2 TriColor. The Robin are dominating the game now and a very mature display from Gattuszola in the centre of midfield is having very positive effects on the younger lads round him (Sorry Ali that does not include you) and most of the play is being orchestrated by the wily old(ish) Italian. An un-intelligible mix up at the back for the Robin when a ball is played over the top by TriColor leads to their equaliser GOAL!!! Robin 3 - 3 TriColor. Hmm is this it then a three all draw is all the Robin are going to get out of a good display? NOPE! Seventy one minutes in Kyle pops up again in the TriColor box and manages to scramble home his second of the game GOAL!!! Robin 4 - 3 TriColor. The Robin's fight is back it has been missing for so long that I had forgotten what it actually looked like. TriColor where shot, arguing among themselves and looking lacklustre in possession all the Robin had to do was run the clock down, and despite Welshy's best efforts to not "GO TO THE F**KING CORNER" with the ball as the Gaffer put it, They managed to see it out.
Robin Hood 4 - 3 TriColor.
Hell yeah! Two wins on the bounce and what a way to do it to coming back from two nil down showed that all the boys have it in them to perform and even go beyond their own expectations. Long may it continue I say. Come on boys go for your hat trick!
Player Ratings
Quavers - 7
Shaggy - 7
Chrissy - 7
Obi-Wan - 7
Kebab - 7.5
J-LO - 6
Skip - 8
Ali "Sex Pest" Brown - 8
Gattuszola - 9
Pone - 7.5
Kyle - 8
Welshy - 6
Dan - 6
MOM as sponsored by Lucazade and Bananas

Tuesday, 20 January 2009

Chew a Beer Mat and Keep it STUM!!!

Sunday 18/01/09
Top Valley School 10:30am
Backup United v Robin Hood FC
The truth is last week just was not good enough. It was time for the Gaffer to change the dressing room into the dressing down room. However the home truths were delivered outside as the dressing room smelt like a sweaty dead fox. Each player is handed a copy of the current league table, it does not make for good reading. Robin Hood FC bottom of the league not what was expected at the start of the season. The Gaffer delivers an impassioned talk backed up by the Guru and rallies the troops. They can win this game, they have the talent, all they needed was the self belief.
The last game between Backup and the Robin ended up in a five all draw, not the best day for both of the back fours. Would we get a similar result today? Despite the blazing sunshine and blue sky it was cold with a bitter wind. But enough of the weather report time for the game.
Peep Peep, First half under way. Did not start like a lot of Sunday league games as it began with pace. Both sets of players seemed up for it, Backup's giant centre back looked commanding and the new 4-5-1 formation of the Robin gave them the numbers in midfield they seemed to be lacking in previous games. The movement still needed work and there was a tendency to lump the ball rather than playing on the floor as god intended (see Brian Clough). But all in all very much a better start than last week lethargic performance. Twenty one minutes in and a slick move started by Ali "Sex Pest" Brown passing to Kyle for a flick through that was latched on to by Pone. Pone's pace saw him through to slot the ball home GOAL!!! All good but Pone you were out of position tut tut hug that touch line you monkey! Backup 0 - 1 Robin. Good start they had got the ball in the back of the net. The jubilation did not last as only seven minutes later a cracking cross from the right hand side of the Robin box cleared Obi-Wan's head to allow Backup's player to chest and volley into the onion bag, great finish acknowledge by everyone, but still GOAL!!! Backup 1 - 1 Robin. Heads did not drop as the Robin realised they had a job to do. In fairness Backups goal was really all they had in a first half that was scrappy but largely dominated by the Robin (when they decided to play football). The half flowed with only a few short stops. Peep Peep end of first half not bad not bad, and The Terminator was leaking Red Diesel for the cause.
Backup 1 - 1 Robin.
The Gaffer and the Guru went through the half time team talk. They knew they had edged that first half and had the beating of Backup in them, they just needed to show the spirit that had seen them win against Station Hotel.
Refreshments over, time for the second half. Starting where they had left off in the first half, the Robin began to play. Kyle began looking a lot sharper than the first half, as if it had taken him forty five minutes to wake up. Gattuszola and Ali "Sex Pest" Brown were pulling the strings in the centre of midfield with Pone and the Terminator offer a outlet on the wings. Defensively the Robin looked good, with Shaggy showing that his patience on the sideline was worth the wait as he puts in a commendable performance in the back four. Sixty Sixth minute and Gattuszola goes on a run. Running at the Backup defense they seemed to be lost as he ghosted passed them, the run culminated in a cross from the right hand side of Backup's box that was half cleared by the defense to Ali "Sex Pest" Brown who thundered in a low powerful drive GOAL!!!! Backup 1 - 2 Robin. From this point on the Robin took control of the game though it was not perfect they never really looked like they were going to lose it. This was confirmed on the seventy fifth minute as a defense splitting pass from Gattuszola sent the Terminator away, hunting the ball down like Sarah Conner and dispatching it in a cold mechanical way (or it may have bounce back at him and gone in off his shin/face/arse) GOAL!!!. Backup 1 - 3 Robin. The Robin cruised to the final whistle and the relief was palpable. This win was very much needed.
Backup United 1 - 3 Robin Hood FC.
Some of the spirit from the past had returned and the lads were visibly chuffed that they had won, but again this needs to be a spring board and the momentum gathered needs to continue. A special mention to Quavers (Adam) who so happy with the win tried to put his head through the Guru's windshield on the drive to the Robin.
Player Ratings
Quavers - 7
Shaggy - 7.5
Obi-Wan - 7
Wayne - 7
Kebab - 7.5
Terminator - 8
Ali "Sex Pest" Brown - 9
Skip - 7
Gattuszola - 7.5
Pone - 7
Kyle - 8
Man of the Match in association with Boots Warm Lube
Ali "Sex Pest" Brown

Goal Scorer PONE
Goal scorer Terminator

Goal Scorer & MOM Ali "Sex Pest" Brown
The Guru & Quavers

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Waste of a Morning

Sunday 11/01/09
Calverton 10:30am
Hudson Roofing v Robin Hood FC

In the months I have been writing the blog for the Robin Hood FC I have never been embarrassed in doing it (unless you count being picked up on grammatical and spelling errors, Cheers Red and 2Shorts). Even in defeat, of which there has been too many, I have always seen the positives and never really questioned the teams effort or spirit.
The bravado and grandstanding in the car park before the game gave the Robin an air of confidence which unfortunately did not transfer on to the pitch. Hudson Roofing have, sorry had a worse record than the Robin and despite the their cup win over the Robin last week on paper the Robin should be too strong for them.

The first half and Hudson had managed to scrape together enough players to get things going. There was no ref so it was agreed between the teams that The Gaffer would officiate. Normally I would now write about all the incident and gladiatorial battles that ensued in the first half. However, without doubt and exception (which includes all the Scottish Football I have watched) it was the most incident free, dull first half in history. The first ten minutes or so the Robin had a numerical advantage which they failed to capitalise on and neither team offered anything remotely resembling a straight cut chance the whole half. So unsurprisingly the first half ended nil nil.

Hudson 0 - 0 Robin.
A moment of inspiration, a mistake or quality football is what the second half needed. Unlike the first half goals were not going to be scarce. We did not have to wait long for the first to come along, forty ninth minute a through ball split the Robin Hood defence in two and Hudson's striker sized the opportunity and buried it. Hudson 1 - 0 Robin. Despite the goal the game still lacked anything enthralling and it seem to me that most of the players on the pitch were just going through the motions. By my timing the next goal came on the sixty ninth minute again against the Robin. Hudson 2 - 0 Robin. The game lumbered on, few chances made, with the lacklustre performance beginning to show on all faces. Calamity!, eighty third minute another shocking display of defending. Hudson 3 - 0 Robin. Two minutes later Robin have a chance to redeem themselves, if ever so slightly, when they are awarded a penalty. The Terminator steps up and with machine like efficiency dispatches the ball into the back of the net. Hudson 3 - 1 Robin. Rather than build on this and restore some dignity to the performance the Robin collapse again and concede another from a corner, woeful marking! Hudson 4 - 1 Robin. The half continues into what seems like endless time added on / injury time. This allows the Robin to grab one more as Pone sets up Gattuszola to drill the ball home. Hudson 4 - 2 Robin. People on the sideline are getting agitated by the length of added on time being played which is not helped when the Robin are awarded another penalty. This time Skip steps up and thunders the ball against the bottom of the right hand upright. Poetic justice is heard on the sideline. The game ends, Hudson 4 - 2 Robin.
In terms of player ratings I was informed by the Gaffer that everyone on the pitch received a FIVE (which I consider generous) with the exception of the Terminator who for his efforts gets a NINE.

Normally in this last paragraph I sum things up and put a positive spin on things but in all honesty it has pained me to write this, so I will conclude by saying Backup United next week see you there.

I'll leave the last word to TV pundit Alan Hansen

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

Cyberdyne Systems model 101

Sunday 04/01/09
Calverton 11:00am
Hudson Roofing v Robin Hood FC

It was FA Cup weekend, which means shocks and giant killings. Forest (Dirty Reds) lead the way with a three nil thumping of the richest club in the world Man City. Cup fever was also alive and well in Calverton. Two re-arranged Section Cup quarter finals being played at the same park! 10:30am kick off saw Calverton Cherry Tree play Pheasant Inn Sunday (Finished 2 - 1 to Calverton Cherry Tree for your information). However the 11:00am kick off is what we are interested in Robin Hood FC against Hudson Roofing. League form goes out of the window when it comes to the cup but seeing as neither the Robin or Hudson had particularly good run of late in the league it could be difficult to call this one.

It was cold! very cold. Gloved fingers were crossed it would not be called off again, but to the relief of all it was on. The lads changed and made their way to the picturesque pitch which over looked open countryside. The ref appeared looking like Buster Blood Vessel and after a quick warm up (lucky them) it was time to start.

PEEP PEEP! The first half kicks off. A tentative start from both sides, probing each other getting a feel for the ball and the pitch (which by the way was rock solid and bobbley, not what you need for a Arsenal style flowing football). The Robin started to make the early running, with some good football considering the conditions with Hudson looking to hit on the counter attack. Some woeful finishing and passing saw Robin riding their luck a little, but otherwise the game went back and forth offering little in the way of guilt edged opportunities for either side. On thirty six minutes the breakthrough came, Hudson conceded a throw in deep in their half, up stepped Kebab-Delap to launch a trademark long throw into the box. The Skipper rose like a majestic salmon swimming upstream to return to its ancestral mating waters and nodded it past the rooted Hudson goal keeper GOAL!!! Hudson 0 - 1 Robin Hood. Hudson's heads dropped, "This could be a rout" I commented to Do-Nut on the sideline. Considering Hudson awful defensive record this season it was not out of place. The Robin dominated the remaining ten minutes of the first half without really carving out a chance for a second. PEEP, PEEEEEEP!

Hudson 0 - 1 Robin Hood

An eagerly awaited second half got underway with those here to watch the Robin having the feeling that things are going their way. However Hudson Roofing did not see it that way and had rallied themselves during the break and manage to raise their heads. Game on. This half Hudson showed some metal and again only a lack of quality denied them an equaliser. Hudson were now pushing to level things, which meant a role reversal from the first half with the Robin hitting Hudson on the counter. Opportunities came and went for both sides but nothing seemed to really endanger the score line. Robin defense was holding up well, with the Terminator seemingly to be in all places at all times, taking knocks but getting back up "That Terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead" or he has won the ball and spanked it out for a throw in. As the day got colder the match drew closer to end, Hudson upped the pressure on the Robin pegging them back into their half. Six minutes, SIX FUCKING MINUTES to go that's all that separated Robin and a semi final of the cup GOAL!!!!! Hudson took advantage of a huge gap in the Robin defense to finally claim the equaliser. Hudson 1 - 1 Robin Hood. Hudson gathered momentum from the goal and continued to pressure the Robin. Hudson could have nicked it before the end of normal time but the ghost of shocking finishing came back to haunt them as their number nine tickled rather than struck the ball toward an open goal, something for which his own supporters gleefully took the piss out of him for. PEEP PEEP.

Hudson 1 - 1 Robin Hood.

Extra Time

Jesus H Christ it was cold and the last thing anyone wanted was extra time, but that is what is needed so after a short break thirty more footballing minutes awaited. The first half of extra time was similar to the beginning of the second in normal time with Robin hitting at Hudson on the break. Again chances came and went for both sides with the quality of the finishing the major factor in the lack of goals.
Second half of extra time saw the Gaffer come on for Pone to make his season debut. The buzz on the side of the pitch was he was likely to grab the winner and spend the rest of the season gloating about it. This almost happened when Ali "sex pest" Brown angled a ball into the box which had it had cleared the defender would have dropped kindly to the Gaffer. But it was not to be, tired legs began to show from both sides and the second half of extra time drew to a close. The trauma of penalties followed.

Robin Penos
Gattuszola - Miss
Kebab-Delap - Miss
Obi-Wan - Miss

Hudson Penos

Scored their first three

Hudson win 3 -0 on penalties

In fairness to Hudson goalkeeper he did well and made three good saves. Heartbreak for the Robin and the cup dream ended for another year.
Well boys time to concentrate on the league and start moving up that Mo-Fo.
You have instant chance for revenge as it Hudson Roofing again on Sunday this time there is three points at stake!!!!!

Skip Goal Scorer

Cammy "Terminator"

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